Check out this video on why it’s important to take risks and why not taking risks will kill you.

(“T” has been featured in David Deangelo’s Interviews with Dating Gurus series and a host of other seminars on women and dating. We welcome him to the IDM. Also note: That is NOT him in the picture above…ha ha)

For the past several years I have always found texting to be a quick and easy way to create sexual attraction. I am not sure if wit and cunning humor can be taught or if it is something that can be practiced and learned over time, but if you find that you posses witty, playful and sometimes downright dirty humor then by all means use it. If you like movie references, Watch the movie Dangerous Liaisons. I love moments such as those I am about to share with you. They create a great connection and there is so much you can do to amp desire between the two of you before you even get face to face, before you even say another word… it’s amazing..

People often will tell me they’ve heard that women want to sleep with me within 5 minutes of meeting me or that I have had sex without speaking another word to her once we’ve exchanged numbers and they want to know how it works. Over the next few installments of this newsletter I’ll address doing just that, plus anything sex, anything sensual and anything fashion that readers would like to learn more about. Here are a few fun things to say, and playful examples of textual flirting. In one example below you can see the entire process, how it builds and how the result is, well, how can it be anything other than great sex?

Additional comments to give you necessary background or eliminate a name have been enclosed in parenthesis

her: Long time no txt. Do you want 2 hook up later?
me: Hi! I just finished dancing the opening to a show or the answer would have been yes.

———————

(days later of not hearing from her)
me: I need some space. Don’t call me so much
(GREAT way to get on her for not getting back to you)
her: u r 2 funny! How have you been.
me: I’ve been great. (small breakdown of my life here) Did you get the new job you wanted?
her: Glad to hear things are going so well! Had an interview last week. I’m singing in church next week.
me: I’m thinking maybe afternoon sex today before 5
her: Sure, I have an hour break here in (city). Come on down

———————

me: where are you?
her: (los Angeles)
me: ah! Why are you always in (los Angeles) when we’re ready to play. Wish I could apparate.
her: I’m a scrabble queen and the word apparate dos not exist. Would you like to replace it with another one?
me: Apparate / Disapparate: to appear and vanish at ones own will. You can look it up on Wikipedia. They’re words that have enjoyed new found popularity with the release of Rowling’s epic novels. You may now call me king.
her: You are a crack up! I still don’t think that would count in scrabble! Ha! I’ll have to think about the king thing.
me: Consider the phrase “(her name)Alexis spent many loathsome nights in the company of other men until at last, to her delight, I would apparate inside her….”
her: ha! I love it.

———————

Me: There were faaaaaaaar too many large breasted women running around the house last night. That shouldn’t be allowed
(note: do NOT send this to a small breasted woman)
Her: haha! You poor thing

———————

me: I’ve just found your panties
her: are you serious? LOL oops
me: Quite. Thinking I should hang them over the door since I don’t have any bed posts
her: ha ha ha what you should do is store them somewhere until I can get them from you
me: Oh I don’t know, maybe displaying them prominently above the Christmas wreath is best… I’ll wash them in cold water first
her: ha. thanks

———————

this is great:

her: So I am eating dove chocolates and on the inside of the wrapper it has little messages. I’ve gotten the same messages 3 times. Temptation is fun….giving in is even better. I find it interesting.
(a message like this comes in guys and you’re done, you’re in)
me: I take action after 2 times, but 3x is a must. I feel certain you find it a bit more than interesting.
(NOTE: guys, I did not write: Great! Come over!)
her:True
me: “Necessary” might be more apt. A pulsing through your body that throbs my name over and over…
me: ha! That’s what I take Dove to mean anyway
her: LOL
me: So who are you eating tonight and when are we going to eat chocolates?
her: No plans for anyone tonight LOL. And whenever you want on the chocolates
(you’re definitely definitely in)
me: is it to late in the evening to have you stay with me tonight?
her: Maybe, I can tomorrow night
her: I must say, spending the night is tempting, maybe I should listen to my chocolate.
(me alternative: chocolate can never steer you wrong. My place in 1-3 hours? But I said:)
me: That would be an excellent piece of advice. Consider seeing me in 1-3 hours and I’ll block out the night for us
her: deal

———————

On the dirty side:
On the way to my house she calls to tell me:
Her: I’m heading in your direction
Me: You’re heading toward my erection?? What!!
(fortunately she was indeed headed toward it)

———————

Me: You have amazing lips. What is your address?
Her: As do you. (address)
Me: we should make out sometime soon
Her: I agree. When can my amazing lips touch yours?
Me: Tomorrow at 420 works great for me
Her: see you then

———————

So there it is. Short but fun! I’ll talk to you all soon. Don’t be afraid to take chances, to be playful, to flirt your ass off but to always be authentic and heart centered. This last sentence is perhaps the best piece of advice I can offer.

Have a story to share? Comment below.

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I like the feeling of being perceived as a hot guy. I’m not deluded by it nor do I think it’s the be all end all of anything, it’s just a sensation I enjoy. Women have so much power in this arena that they command men with the slightest glance or flip of the hair and as far as I’m concerned, I want in. So my idea of sexy went something like this: A&F muscle fit white polo with the collar standing straight up and the neck of the shirt sitting wide on the chest so you see a large triangle of my neck line not tiny bit of skin. Military green A&F rugged sentinel jacket, belt with a sideways cross as the buckle pulled to one side, loose jeans that I can move in, Italian shoes, great cologne and a green military cap pulled down over my eyes and to the right. Looking at me dead on you catch my gaze but the first thing you notice is my jaw line, mouth, unshaved face and the low hat. Now guys, I’m not trying to write gay porn here; but you’ve got to get a visual to see how this works. Dressing like that changes things. It changes the way you feel, the way you walk and the way people respond to you. It changes the attention that women give you and also the respect (or jealousy) that men throw your way. It’s like being in costume. Women are in costume all the time: makeup, heels, jewelry, earrings, skirts, racy tops, hairstyles, beads, charms, stones, nail polish… come on. Just think Halloween and you’ve got your costume on—you can break out of who you are no matter how tame or wild you normally are.
Alright, so dinner was fun and afterwards we made our way to the club next door. It was early and we were one of 10 people there so far but that didn’t stop the smoke machines from spilling out in the room, the music banging, the huge Chinese lanterns above from glowing luminescent and a trio of Belvedere vodka girls from approaching us to sample their poison. My friend is a sexy little thing that’s nearly 40 but she is from an older generation so her dancing mixing with my breed of dancing is a little unique to watch but we did well and drew some positive attention. Finally the floor filled and within the hour, as is wont to happen in club environments, standing room is about all you get to try and do your thing. Bouncers were protecting the bottle service territory i.e. every possible booth in the place one might sit.
At some point probably close to midnight either the DJ got intelligent or got switched out and he stopped abruptly switching songs from 70s to 2000’s without so much of a fade in and finally put on some really good hip hop. You can generally feel the energy of the room change when a DJ mixes well. It’s a building, an increase of energy, an excitement… like being mile high on X in front of a wall of speakers at a rave during a techno drum climax with glow sticks… Yeah anyway.
My friend needs to get up early the next day and leaves juuuuuuuuuuuust as a couple of very cute girls make their way over to me. One is wearing silk and here’s where it gets good. I’m fascinated by the power of dance. Done right it’s like a mating call or a call to action. If you could put into words the response that a woman has when she sees someone dancing that excites her, once you clear out all of her self-talk garbage like “Oh, he dances better than me and I don’t want him to look better than me, or I’m the woman and that’s intimidating, or it’s girls night or I have a boyfriend I shouldn’t feel this way” it would sound something like:
“I’m yours. If you want to, you can just put yourself inside me now, but I’d rather you tease me a little bit. Make me feel sexy. Make me feel like a woman. Touch me, grind me and move like a man. Confidently, aggressively… You don’t even have to say a word. Just take me, I’m yours.” Yup.
So we have a little of that going on and within moments my hands are presented with full access to a very round ass that’s being thrust on me, legs, chest and whatever else… Just play with it nicely says her energy… I can do that.
30 minutes of this and dancing off each other and crunking out — wait am I allowed to say that as a white guy? — and we get some air outside. My favorite part: “I’m Jessica by the way,” she says, accompanied by an outstretched hand begging for a formal hand shake. Our bodies just finished speaking a very different language inside the club, and yet, here is this hand and name introduction. I know what your body feels like but now let’s shake hands. It’s just odd but girls do it. I politely shake and pull her in for a hug.
Women, or people rather respond in kind so my energy is calibrated to be calm, friendly and more and more these days as REAL as I can possibly be. I just do me.
The more I look at this girl and her friend who by the way is celebrating her birthday and flits in and out of our conversation, the more they look familiar—always a good sign. So, we’re talking, she asks a lot of questions and birthday girl comes back to the mix. Now I am introduced again by name and she says “OH! That’s a unique name! That’s the same name our dance and yoga instructor had from a long time ago, remember Jess?” Well, turns out I WAS their dance and yoga instructor FIVE years ago. They thought “awkward,” but I thought hilarious, and then as the friend always does, she says, “Take good care of her she’s a good girl,” and birthday girl goes home.
Law of attraction is a faithful companion. It is there in every moment to tell you exactly what you’re putting out and exactly what you’re getting in return. It’s a constant signal responding to how you’re thinking and feeling; not 4 years ago, as a child, in high school or even last year, but now right now. Now right now. Now right now. But still I am happily amazed how I literally did not know a soul in this club of 300 people and who do I gravitate towards? Who do I get lined up with? These two. So cool.
Now believe it or now I am not going to tell you the story of how I then told her I was leaving and asked if she was too, gave her a ride to her car, smoothly invited her over, she followed me to my house, went right to my bedroom climbed in my bed and fucked like crazy as it rained outside until we exhausted ourselves.
I am going to tell you the story however of how it was raining, I told her I was leaving and asked if she was too, gave her a ride to her car, smoothly invited her over, she followed me to my house, went right to my bedroom without any alcohol drugs or other, climbed right in my bed and…
Talked. Yeah Talked. For the better part of an hour. I was not attracted to her. And by the way, I strongly advise against fucking a girl just because she’s there, or because she has nice tits or because you’re horny unless you’re really feeling a connection with her. And I don’t mean the most amazing connection of your life, like a jump into a relationship connection, or this is a girl I can date or I love this girl or any of that. I just mean does she get you going? Do you feel that hot energy between you two? Does she make you feel like if you don’t have her then and now the world might just come to and end.

A while back I was eating alone in a restaurant and a gorgeous Ukranian girl took my order. Big blue eyes, long black hair past her bum, enormous full, round perfect breasts, full kissable mouth. Our eyes met and I wanted her. She wound up getting off shortly after and needed a ride home. I offered. After stopping the car in front of her house, moments after meeting her, she told me I could ask for her number and I just smiled, leaned over, cupped my hand around the back of her neck and kissed her. And kissed her. And kissed her. My temperature gauge in the car must have surely been wrong? 106 degrees? It was HOT. A few minutes later she said, “We HAVE to stop, give me your number!” A week later and after some really spectacular sex we were talking about how we met (You can only make comments about how you met, and how attracted you were to each other when you met AFTER you have sex, then it’s a fun topic of conversation) and she said: “I knew it the second our eyes met.” That is what I mean when I say you FEEL it. Pause, pause, pause.

So back to my story of the girl from the club who is in my bed talking to me and is now, now giving me a foot massage. I’m not horny, I am not attracted to her and I really just feel like a massage but I am exhausted. I say, I’m too tired to return the favor she says, it’s ok, just lay here. Relax. It’s ok if you fall asleep, I had fun. I say I’m being a bad host, but I’m just so sleepy… Her hands begin to tighten and squeeze around my shoulders and neck, I feel my face melting into my down pillow and it’s so damn comfortable. I say, you’re gonna put me to sleep with that massage and she says, it’s ok, just enjoy it, I’ll see myself out… And then come the caresses. Who doesn’t love to be caressed softly by a woman? Caresses on my arm, on my face, on my cheek. Am I in heaven? I peel back an eyelid to look at her and smile in appreciation. She is just there, looking at me, smiling at me, caressing. I let the weight of my body sink into my bed and move my legs slowly around to feel the sheets. Then more caresses just on my face, on my face until…
I’m wake up the next morning. Just me. I’m still marinating in my bed feeling relaxed. That’s not an experience you have every day. That which is like unto itself is drawn: Law of Attraction is a faithful companion. If you’re tuned in it gives you everything you need whenever you ask for it. You can have it however you want it friends. And that was exactly what I needed that night. Any belief, any thought that pops into your mind that tells you otherwise is just the excuse that we use to keep ourselves from it. There is no wrong here, there is no one way here, just the way that we want to create our life. There is something to focusing on seeing what you want to see, believing what you want to believe, and those experiences present themselves to you… always.
Till next time. I’m out.
T